|[basically, I got tired of looking for a funny someecard; source]|
1. Smokers 2. Humorless personalities 3. Stupidity 4.Passive aggressiveness 5.- Oh wait, it's supposed to be about books. Visit The Broke and the Bookish for this week's Top Ten Tuesday.
1. Books that don't start on page 1- It's so misleading (and a pain when trying to assign work to students with different versions).
2. Books with incredibly long chapters- I'm talking about more than 40 pages. Chapters are important when trying to decide when to take breaks to refill my wine glass.
3. Books bought by the masses- Let's be super-duper honest right now. I consider myself to be a tad more literary than the average person, therefore if someone who threw themselves a victory party because they finished Gone Girl is recommending something I'm going to be skeptical. Exceptions exist.
4. Mass market paperbacks- Most of them look so.... cheap. And uninspired. And while in a different context, there's that word "mass" again....
5. Unrealistic dialogue- Believe me, I know that dialogue can be tough to write, but that still doesn't mean I'm forgiving of it.
6. Books with movie covers- Tacky, tacky, tacky.
7. Books with poorly written sex scenes- If an author can't authentically write about knockin' boots they need to either get out in the field and do some more research, or find some way other around it.
8. Historical fiction- This is pure and complete preference. I know that there are some great novels out there that are historical, they're just 80% of the time not my thing.
9. Books written by celebrities- First of all, they're generally note even actually written by the celebrity, but instead a ghost writer. Secondly, go use your fame to sell something else... like perfume.
10. Excessive blurbing- Fine, I get it, people like you're book. But 8 pages of blurbs? Inferiority complex much?