Five Things About... Five Things About Loved and Wanted: A Memoir of Choice, Children, and Womanhood by Christa Parravani

While this is the story of a desperate mother who wanted an abortion, I think either “side” can learn from it. It’s not preachy or insulting, just simply Parravani’s story. 

This was such a good reminder that healthcare is so different in different states. I live in California and, while I’ve had to deal with the bureaucratic nature of a PPO insurance, I’ve never felt like I couldn’t get what I’ve needed or wanted or chosen, if so be. 

I think there’s this romantic notion attached to academia- professors in tweed, bumbling around their Victorians, hobnobbing with intellectuals at dinner parties on the weekends. This is sadly not true and we see how much Parravani struggles to make ends meet.

I am THE LAST person to criticize the complicated nature of a marriage, but she did put certain details of their financial nature out into the public with a published memoir. Her husband seemed to refuse to pull his economic weight in the marriage, intentionally, and I found that really, really  frustrating on her behalf. It’s one thing to be unemployed or whatever, but to be working and not really contributing is something else.

Abortion rights aside, the struggles she experienced with the medical staff at the hospital when her son was born was infuriating. He was severely jaundiced, tongue-tied to the point of practically starving, and had broken his clavicle during delivery (they didn’t even know!). And they sent them home! And then dismissed her concerns multiple times after that! The system that refused to help her terminate the (very, very early) pregnancy then refused the very baby she birthed proper care. Unacceptable.