An Exception

I hate corny things- baby showers, Hallmark cards, tearful wedding toasts, and Delilah's evening dedication show make me want to vomit. The "inspirational genre" of books is no exception. I'm sorry, you've had to get through some shit in your life, but, as shocking as it is, most of have (we've just haven't opted to capitalize on it). When life hands you lemons, write a book and find a publisher, I guess.


There are always exceptions, though, as I found while reading Matt Long's The Long Run. I started it last week while gearing up for the Disneyland Half Marathon, figuring the story of a man who runs a marathon after being nearly destroyed by a bus would be a nice kick in the ass. While I was too busy training and working to finish it before the race, I still found Long's picture on the cover enough to remind me that if he could run 26.2 miles (and later complete an Iron Man competition) after weeks in a coma and 40 operations, I could finish 13.1. After finishing the book last night I felt like an absolute wimp, but, more than ever, was dedicated to the idea that being healthy and in shape should always be a priority (stop making excuses, people). Doctors attributed Long's ability to make it through his accident to the fact that he was very active prior to it- his heart and the rest of his body were strong enough to survive what would have killed most people.

Long's story isn't corny- he's a NYC fire fighter, marathon veteran, bar owner, triathlete, and Iron Man, for Christ's sake. Sentimental occasionally, yeah, but not in a way that makes you want to reach for the bucket. More than anything, it's honest, reflective, and motivational. Shit happens- you either decide to make the best out of it and keep living, or you curl up in the fetal position and drink whiskey.

Am I a convert? Am I going to rush out and buy every renewed person's book? Definitely not. But, every once in awhile there is someone, like Matt Long, who actually earns the right to tell their story (and make money off it).

Amazon Vine aka People Who Won't Shut Up

As soon as I'm done reading a book I want to talk about it- unfortunately, I can rarely find another person who has read what I've finished. A few years ago I started reviewing my reads on amazon.com, unabashedly enjoying the fact that I was gracing the public with my opinions and conclusions. A year or so ago, Amazon sent me an email inviting me to join Amazon Vine, a select group that are given free books to review. Twice a month I receive a list of books to choose from, many of which are newer authors, although I have gotten books from more well-known writers as well. Usually the books haven't been released yet, so sometimes the copies are just the semi-corrected galleys, which is actually pretty neat. So, for those interested in my reviews (I'm up to 101 now), check out:

http://www.amazon.com/gp/cdp/member-reviews/A2VUNCELWAV29X/ref=cm_pdp_rev_all?ie=UTF8&sort_by=MostRecentReview

My reviews consist of those from Vine and those that I've purchased; the more obscure ones are probably from Vine (sometimes I get a little overzealous with the free book idea).

The True Danger

In a world where zombies and vampires are all the rage, people forget about a more domestic danger: lawn gnomes. They're sneaky little creatures that lurk around holding pick-axes, for Christ's sake.

All joking aside, Amazon's Vine Program sent me (okay, after I requested it to review... for free) Chuck Sambuchino's How to Survive a Garden Gnome Attack the other day and I just spent the last twenty minutes flipping through it and am really reconsidering my adoration of these mischievous little creatures. At first I was concerned about spending the time away from grading papers, but I feel so much more informed now. Sambuchino lays it all out for the reader- the gnomes are determined to take over and we have to stop them. He provides several chapters on defending your property, protecting yourself, and the best ways to destroy and dispose of these supposed "statues." For example, did you know that the best defense is creating holes in your yard and then pouring cement over the gnomes once they fall in? Having a dog is also extremely helpful, as is constructing a moat (as long as you don't live somewhere too cold). As far as weapons go, avoid guns and flame throwers, sticking to shovels, rakes, and hockey sticks.

You can never be too careful- make sure to watch for sawdust, rearranged items on shelves, and circular dents in your lawn. Don't be scared. You can get through this.

Moment of Weakness

I think I've clearly established the fact that the last thing I currently need is more books, especially since my reading has slowed down since work has started again. I must confess, last week, there was a moment of weakness.

I have a lot going on right now and am a bit stressed. A nice quick distraction is this awesome website- you may have heard of it - Amazon.com. Nowhere else can I find my very own personalized recommendations, the lists of all award winners, bestseller's lists, and editor's monthly picks. Usually I can get by with window shopping and adding things to my wish list on the site, but, as I mentioned, it wasn't a happy day.

Here were my picks:

1-3: The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo, The Girl Who Played With Fire, and The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet's Nest- Stieg Larsson So, I'm slightly on the fence about this purchase. I'm interested but a little concerned it might be too "pulpy" for my liking. Plus, the three have spent way too much time on the top of the bestseller's lists, which makes me very suspicious. But, all three were bundled for a good price, and I'm sure I'll end up seeing the movies, so I figured I'd go for it now. I love a good mystery- we'll see if they're done well.

4: The House of Tomorrow- Peter Bognanni Supposed to be a witty, intellectually humorous book about young love, music, and the whole notion of home.

5: Cook This, Not That- David Zinczenko and Matt Goulding I love cookbooks and frequently leave restaurants trying to "health-ify" meals I've just eaten to make at home. I've glanced through it and it seems pretty good.

When they arrived yesterday I felt absolutely no guilt, as it was an equally, if not more so, shitty day than one the books were bought on. Today, as I try to make room I'm feeling a little buyer's remorse. Just a little.

Self-Publising: How One Author is Doing it Her Way

Kate O'Hegarty, author of Mieradome
Photo- 2010 Vania Stoyanova

From conception to birth, novels are a definite labor of love. Writing the actual story is just half the battle; if following the traditional path, the author then has to find a reputable agent, pray for the interest of a publishing house, and then battle it out with editors to get the novel printed, marketed, and sold. In recent years, the economy has not helped this industry at all, causing companies to tighten their purse-strings and sign fewer new novelists.

This isn't stopping some up and comers, though, such as Kate O'Hegarty, a fellow Modesto High graduate (go panthers!). Starting her fantasy young-adult novel almost eight years ago, O'Hegarty is now in the absolute final stages of production, ready to bring her readers into the adventurous world of Mieradome very soon. O'Hegarty first tried the ordinary route, sending queries to agents and publishers, only to hear that they liked her book, but were concerned it didn't quite match their current catalogs.

Most of us would have stopped there- not this girl. O'Hegarty decided to investigate the self-publishing route, reading every guide and article out there to learn the process. Slowly, things started coming together- her sister, a graphic-designer, created the beautiful cover and various designs throughout the book, and Jeff Brian Fischer was hired to do the illustrations for the website. While working out the details of the novel's production, including finding a company to print the text, O'Hegarty also took on marketing and publicity, taking advantage of social media, including Facebook, Twitter, book bloggers, and online reviewers.

O'Hegarty was very upfront about the advantages and disadvantages of this huge endeavor that is self-publishing. She welcomes having "full control" over the editing process, artistic touches, and promotional aspects, yet does acknowledge that the marketing component of an indie project can be difficult. When self-publishing, the author must also supply the upfront costs for hiring the necessary creative talents, the marketing campaign, and the printing of the book (fingers crossed she makes it all back).

Next up, Kate will continue to promote her book while working on a sequel to Mieradome, which is available for purchase at Borders, Barnes and Noble, on Amazon, or by request at your favorite independent bookstore. For more information on her book (or even just to see a really awesome book website), visit www.mieradome.com.