Dogs Hate Story Time

Today was one of those days that I actually said aloud "Thank effing goodness I don't have kids" after being home for about five minutes. My husband was at the office and the dogs expected frisbee and tennis ball action after being cooped up all day, not to mention that I was tired and cranky from life work. A chatty little child that needed help with homework, or a baby in need of a diaper change, would definitely not have rocked my world. Don't misunderstand- I absolutely want a chance to brainwash my own little spawn, just not today (or this weekend, because I have plans). 

I do, though, wish I had a kid to read to and buy books for- I have lately been adding books like crazy to my children's book wish list (no, I'm not pregnant; at a certain age you have to add this disclaimer whenever a maternal habit pops up). This is one of the only things I miss about teaching elementary school- the opportunity to read fun stories to a captivated audience. This is where you have the chance to truly help kids become life-long readers. There are so many great, creative kid's books out there that get overshadowed by the stupid ones with Pixar characters, sound buttons, or even those based off a phone app, all of which I'll do my best to prevent my kids from having (and, seriously, for the love of God, please don't "Oh, Christine you'll feel differently when you have kids" me). Here are some that I'll definitely buy some day:

The Incredible Book-Eating Boy by Olive Jeffers- The more books you eat the smarter you get (a good book to discuss fiction vs reality and book care with)

Iggy Peck, Architect by Andrea Beatty- Kid is obsessed with building things.

The Fantastic Flying Books of Mr. Morris Lessmore by Wiliam Joyce- Same as the short that won the Oscar.

Monsters Eat Whiny Children by Bruce Eric Kaplan- True story.

Children Make Terrible Pets by Peter Brown- A bear decides she wants a child as a pet.

The Quiet Book by Deborah Underwood- Kids should learn the beauty of shutting up.

That's Why We Don't Eat Animals by Ruby Roth- So, we might be a vegetarian household now (Lent is over and we're still meat-free). Not committing yet...

Blackout by John Rocco- Kid learns that you can actually have fun with things that don't require electricity. Gasp. 

In the meantime, I'm going to keep working on story time with Cordie and Chomsky.


  1. I'm a lover of kids' books, myself. I seem to know many pregnant people/new parents, and they all got many childrens books from me. (I believe I told my bff when she was 8 weeks pregnant, "It's never too soon to start thinking about your child's literacy.") The Lorax is my all time favorite. Five Minutes' Peace, and The House That Jack Built are also amazing.*

  2. I read and reread the kids books written by Roald Dahl on a regular basis - absolutely fantastic!

  3. Christine! I'm sure there is no need to explain why this post has me super excited, but seriously, AWESOME! I now have a few new titles to add to my growing collection of children's books (this kid of mine will be a reading genius by the time it's 6 months if the amount of books I keep buying has anything to do with it!)
    Thanks for posting this.