Bad Feminist, Part 2

The other day I wrote a post quickly reviewing Roxane Gay's Bad Feminist. First of all, there really isn't such a thing as "bad feminist," really. Sure, there are different degrees of feminism, but I hate the idea of declaring someone "bad" at it, and I'm pretty sure Gay would agree.

What I did find amusing and thought-provoking, though, was her sort of gradual cataloging of what would make her a bad feminist by the stereotypical definition of the term. This of course made me think of my own, imperfect, version of feminism and what I do that would make a "good feminist" and a "bad feminist." I started explaining each item, but thought I'd spare everyone the novel. 

"Good"

1. I didn't change my name when I got married.

2. We have separate bank accounts and maintain a joint one for household expenses only. We split things like vacations, dinners out, etc... 

3. I believe women should receive equal pay for equal work. 

4. I passionately believe in a woman's right to do what she pleases when it comes to her reproductive/contraceptive health. 

5. I have never let men pay for me on dates just because they're the male. Except on my birthday. 

6. I believe women should have the opportunity to apply for any job out there, especially in the public sector/military. 

7. I do not believe a woman should be submissive to a husband for religious, traditional, or any other purposes. 
8. I think the concept of chivalry is archaic. 
9. My husband and I don't know each other's passwords for anything; not our phones, bank accounts, credit cards, emails, or anything else. 

"Bad"

1. I didn't put up a fight about my son having my husband's last name. 

2. I do most of the domestic chores and childrearing at home (this one I have to explain some; my husband commutes and isn't home late, while I'm home much earlier, so while tiring, it is logical).

3. I shave my legs every single day. Sometimes twice if I, for some reason, shower more than once.

4. I sincerely (and I guess vainly) care about my looks. 

5. Sometimes when I go to Home Depot I don't even bother trying to find things myself; I find a nice gentleman worker, smile, act slightly clueless, and let him find those light bulbs, or whatever, for me. 

6. I've let men be aggressive, condescending, and disrespectful towards me.

7. I think that women would get more respect when it came the issue of equality if they didn't put down men in the argument (is that bad?). Actually sometimes I think being so vocal, period, pushes people away from the cause. It's tough. 
8. I hate the "you go, girl!" movement. I hate how women get all cheesy and annoying about empowering each other. 
9. I get a tad bit pissy every Valentine's Day because we don't celebrate it.