Adding, Not Subtracting

There's been a lot happening in my life lately that has caused me to do a great deal of reflecting. Actually, "reflecting" is probably too generous and introspective of a word; "obsessing, "worrying," or "ruminating" is probably more accurate. At the heart of what's going on from my end of things is this simple question: what can I control? There's a lot that's happened/is happening that I simply cannot control. For example: how other people act and treat me, home-related repairs, logistical matters at work, etc... As much as I try to put on my problem-solving hat I have to accept that I can't fix everything. So where does that leave me? With things that I can control.

That's dangerous territory too, for me. Today I spent almost nine-hours straight running errands, cleaning, and cooking, just so I felt like I had control of my environment and brain. I spend a lot of time on the treadmill, making lists, and creating contingency plans. I wake up at 3 am and struggle to get back to sleep, the wheels of my brain trying to master my life. And because of this struggle I've let a lot of things go and have picked up other bad habits, like wayyyyy too much Diet Coke, crappy snacks, pointless phone time, and being crankier than normal, to name a few.

Today in the midst of my internal madness I remembered an old blogger I used to read, a dietician, and she'd always say that it's easier to add things than subtract things when it came to eating healthy. That concept, and it's extension, and I had a moment, that's for sure. 

Basically, the notion is that instead of telling yourself not to do something, you add in positive things, which will slowly take over the negativity. So, for example, instead of saying "NO MORE DIET COKE" (I'm having heart palpations just typing this) I'd say "drink more water." Instead of "stop worrying" instead I need to add a time of day where it's okay to worry or suggestions of other things to think about instead.

Here are some things that I'm going to try to focus on ADDING this month, instead of taking away:

- ADD more water
- ADD more sleep (not sure how, but even ten more minutes a night)
- ADD more "phone on the counter" time (as opposed to at my fingertips)
- ADD more journaling (instead of "not worrying")
- ADD more 1:1 time with Sawyer on week days (weekends are great already)
- ADD vitamins and supplements in the morning 
- ADD more outdoor time (hiking in Yosemite made me so happy)
- ADD more grace for others having a rough time      
- ADD more "just saying hey" texts to friends 

 We do what we do to get by, right?

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