Bookish (and not so Bookish) Thoughts

Hey there! It's time for the weekly BS (but in a good way, yes?)- link up below so everyone can read yours too! 

1. What the eff is this nonsense? This is completely unacceptable and opens the door (much like the Hobby Lobby fiasco) for additional discrimination.

2. I put my big-girl panties on a updated my phone to the newest IOS. This is dramatic stuff for me- first I had to back it up on my computer, which I then had to backup on my external hard drive, and then I had to delete a shit-ton of stuff to make room. Once everything finished my first order of business was taking off the ridiculous emoji function of my keyboard. When do I need a little image of a man wearing a turban? A VHS player? A mailbox? Unless I lose the ability to use speech (Broca's Area? Or something like that?) and desperately need to convey to someone that a turbaned man put a VHS in my mailbox we will all be fine.

3. Don't tell Sawyer, but I bought him these for Christmas:

4. Any good recommendations for boardgames for two? Other than Yahtzee and Scrabble.

5. The hours from 6-9 am are some of the most happiest for me. Why? Because that is when I am mostly heavily caffeinated. 6-9 pm doesn't suck either, since I'm home in my yoga pants with my little guy.

6. I'm working on helping to develop a Dystopian Unit of study for the Common Core committee and it's a little fun (despite the fact that I won't be teaching it in the foreseeable future because of the courses I teach). We're focusing on Animal Farm, Fahrenheit 451, Brave New World, and 1984. I have my Master's in Curriculum, Instruction, and Assessment, so I feel like maybe a tiny bit of that is being utilized. I think working for a -gasp- textbook company would someday maybe be kind of... neat (and dirty, at the same time).

7. My child woke up every hour or two allllll night long last night. He doesn't need to eat, so I stand by him, pop his pacifier in and pat his belly. He goes back to sleep withing a few minutes, while I'm up for at least fifteen more. He was sleeping through the night up until a week or two ago, so I suppose we're going through one of those little sleep regressions everyone warns about. Or, MY BABY IS THE DEVIL AND HATES ME. There's that.

[for the record, this is not my child. And I will sleep... just not after 7 am]

 8. I got my hands on a some of the PiYo videos, to try them out to see if they'd ever be something I'd want. I did the introductory video last night and was pleased to see that a lot of the moves, while renamed, are just yoga moves I've done a million times. I was less than pleased to feel sore today. Actually, I lie, I was a little pleased- that means it works!

9. One of my old students, who just happens to be my favorite kid ever taught, surprised me the other night (with her friend, who is also very high up my list) at my house (yes... she know where I live- she should probably be a PI or something) with the sweetest gift EVER. Her and her friend took all these crazy inside jokes we have and spelled them out with Scrabble letters that they displayed in a frame. It was so, so sweet. 

10. The only show that I'm up-to-date on is Parenthood and I'm so pissed that they left the Joel/Julia drama on a cliffhanger last week. In fact, I think I may have blurted out "those fucking bastards!" as soon as it left with the two of them facing each other at the door. This is why you just wait and binge watch things.

Bookish (and not so Bookish) Thoughts

Link up below!

1. Some grammar humor (from the most inappropriate show ever):

2. Confession: I don't say the Pledge of Allegiance, nor do I make my students. I have no problem when people say it, but it's not something I partake in myself. No, I am not joining ISIS.

3.  I made these last weekend and they were delicious (spoiler alert: it involves apples and snickerdoodles).

4. When you complain and someone says "welcome to motherhood" or "welcome to teaching" or "welcome to the jungle" they're basically saying "you're not unique, stop complaining, shut your face."

5. It's expensive and wasteful, but I effing love parchament paper.

6. I hadn't thought about Chicago Hope, the nineties medical drama, in years, but for some reason really wanted to watch it last night. Instead I googled pictures of Christine Lahti, Mark Harmon, and Hector Elizondo.

7.  One of the most important things to learn when teaching high school students is to not take things personally. As I "attach" myself to groups of students this is something I have to remember. Teenagers are emotional, weird, opinionated creatures that don't always consider other perspectives or empathize well (heck there are a lot of adults who fall into the same boat).  But I still love them.

8. There have been a few different blog posts floating lately that run to the tune of "mom, yeah you're tired and put everyone before yourself, but you really should pay more attention to your husband and make him feel like the hot young stud he was when you started dating." Excuse me, but back that 1950s stand-by-your-man train of BS up. Most of them throw in a line at the end that tell men to "not forget your wives," but the sentiment is that we as moms should bend over backwards to make sure our husbands feel loved and special even when they don't. How about this? How about an article that tells husbands to start recognizing that their wives work their butts off all day, many going to work and then coming home and continuing the labor? Of course, not because then we'd be labeled as "feminist bitches" or "needy" or whatever insult whatever enraged man wants to spit out. Okay, I'm done now. I just don't need some stay-at-home mom who runs a blog called something like "Lace and Lollipops" (or whatever) to tell me that I need to rub my husband's feet when I get home, because "golly gee, he is a maaaaaaan." Now I'm really done.

 

9. My students are working on a batch of IOPs, a formal 10-15 minutes presentation on an element of the text we're working on. Presenting is tough, so I sympathize with them. Some of the most talkative, outgoing kids become the complete opposite- the other day I spotted one kid's hands trembling as he held his cards. Granted, some don't prepare adequately and don't research as well as they should, but I have noticed that public speaking is a skill that we're not teaching well enough in our schools. In the future I need to give a crash course on speech giving- body language, eye contact, etc... 

10. I want to learn how to sew better- I fantasize about making myself cute skirts and vintage- looking dresses. How awesome would that be? A yard or two of fabric plus the various notions runs less than $20. Unfortunately, all I can currently do it a basic straight stitch and buttons. I also want to start making scarves. If I had time I'd try to take a class or something.

Why 'Fifty Shades of Gray' is a Bad Idea*

1. It was inspired by Twilight- E.L. James started writing Twilight fan-fiction and it slowly morphed into her own series.

2. When I say "inspired," I mean "heavily inspired." I make it no secret that I think Twilight is crap, but I am more opposed to blatantly "borrowing" ideas, which many readers have reported has happened here (remember, I haven't read it, but it's being said over and over again by those who have). If it weren't for Twilight she wouldn't have her text. There are some really great comparisons under the "one star" reviews on Amazon and on Galley Cat. Originality is important to me; I'm hearing this is not.

3. From what the reviews say, the writing is somewhere around an eighth grade level. Are you serious? Grown adults are spending money and time reading "novels" that are something a hormonal little girl who fantasizes about Justin Bieber can fully comprehend? Really? Way to sell your self short, people. But, then again, mainstream adult fiction reading at a low level is nothing new.

4. This book has been labeled with the term "mommy porn," a phrase that definitely gives me the heebie jeebies. Personally, that invokes the image of a thirty-five year old woman getting bonged in the laundry room with Windex in one hand and little Ben's bottle in the other. No thanks. I don't have a problem with porn or erotica, but "mommy porn" is definitely not a turn on. And yes, I get that the term means that it's porn for mommies, but still.

5. The reported advance James made from selling the hard-copy rights over to Vintage is seven figures. Over a million dollars! This is insane. Ridiculous. Like poetry, anyone can write romance. It's a formula: girl meets boy, girl has a problem, boy pretends to fix it, they do it, they do it again a different way, some other surface level plot event happens, they do it again, etc... Seven effing figures (no pun intended).

6. The series acquired its immense following as an eReader format. Can this get any worse?

7. Oh, and there's going to be a movie.

8. On a serious level, there are concerns about just how the sex and relationships are presented. Dr. Drew Pinsky, on his HLN show, discussed the dangerous "rape fantasy" aspect of the book (it's about a woman who basically enters a contract to be someone's sex slave). Granted I don't think we can hold a book responsible for making people act a certain way, it's definitely not healthy to glamorize it. I also agree with Drew's, and others', belief that it sets the women's movement back, as does anything that sets women up as sexually helpless. It's one thing to bust out the handcuffs and blindfolds occasionally, but the idea of romanticizing total sexual domination is not cool with me.

9. There are three of them.

10. The fact that this book is getting so much attention is extremely aggravating. I understand that this post has now become a piece of hypocrisy, but I don't care. It's so infuriating that quality literature is lucky to get a short write up hidden on page seventeen of a newspaper or magazine, while this is getting segments on TV shows. I try to placate myself with the reassurance that I don't necessarily want to read what the "masses" are, but...

Conclusion: if you read this I will cut you (out of my life).

Photo Credit: The Writer's Coffee Shop

*I haven't read this, nor will I ever.

Note: Due to the exceptionally well-written comment (see below) by "Anonymous," I'd like to add that this is more a diatribe as to why I will not read it. In case you hadn't yet figured that out....

Ch-Ch-Changes

I'm not even a Davie Bowie fan, but it was the only thing I could come up with. I actually I think I like The Flight of the Concord's song "Bowie in Space" more than his actual music ("Receiving transmissions from David Bowie's nipple antennae" gets me every time). My husband sang this song for weeks straight and played the soundtrack for even longer, so I had it stuck in my head for probably two months straight. Crap, now I'm singing about David Bowie's boobies. Oh hell, for your enjoyment:

And now the 95% of you that don't "get it" have either moved on to more civilized blogs or have un-followed me all together.

Let's try this again.

Focus restored.

Check out the two new tabs I've added recently- "About Me" (which unfortunately doesn't shed any light as to why I'm obsessed with cereal, why I think motorcycle gangs are neat, or my obsession with blimps ) and "The Ultimate To-Do List," where I've listed all the books I own but haven't read yet. I also changed a few things on the right, but those aren't really important.

And yes, it was necessary to ramble on about David Bowie and include a youtube video for something that probably didn't really need an actual blog post.

Brainwashing the Youngins

My students are finishing up Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury this week and I gave them an assignment with some drawing components. I was very amused, and pleased. The brainwashing is working (I love The Bible by: God, which is a text discussed in the story).

We'll let not knowing how to spell "awesome" slide. Oh, and to the one above, Charlotte's Web and Harry Potter are better than A Walk to Remember. But still, you've got the rest somewhat accurate.