Bookish (and not so Bookish) Thoughts

Link up below! (And hello and welcome to some of those that have just been starting to participate! I'm trying to find the time to jump over and visit your blogs, but I have a 4 month old and just went back to work- to say things are crazy is an understatement!)

1. I'm so conflicted about the ice bucket challenge. It's for such a great cause, and is so entertaining, but here in California we're in drought crisis mode. Being from the Central Valley I'm pretty sensitive to this stuff, since so many family friends are farmers and depend on irrigation for their lively-hood. Plus, don't we feel a little bad for the people in third-world countries who don't even have access to clean water? But still, so much money for ALS. 

2. I love writing tests sometimes:

3. Today was our fifth day with students and out eighth overall. Getting into the swing of things has been really tough- I'm exhausted, I hate taking Sawyer to daycare (despite being totally comfortable with the provider... I just miss him), and I'm still getting over losing my beloved senior class. 

4. Speaking of the seniors, several came to visit me today, so that was nice. 

5. How do we feel about kombucha? I'm scared to try it, but it's all the rage right now, and we know how important it is to be trendy.

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6. Yesterday while at the grocery store an employee was checking out and wanted to buy a pack of cigarettes. The checker straight-up refused to get them for her, saying, "Nope, we take care of our own here." The employee gave in, admitting that she did have an electric one she was trying to use more. It was great.

7. The school year our district gave each teacher $500 to spend in their classrooms- and astronomical amount for our area (profession?). I went to the teacher supply store, which is mostly geared towards elementary teachers, and piled my cart full of random (but useful) crap, thinking I had spent a lot. Nope, not even a third. I'm not used to this luxurious lifestyle.

8. A campus supervisor asked me, and my very pregnant friend, when we were due. Come again? Say the fuck what? I admit it- I have five pounds to lose still, but they're hanging out around my ass, not my belly. 

9. I need to devote some serious time to looking at books that have come out in the last few months and ones that are on their way. Not that I'm buying them, thanks to a self-imposed financial diet, but I still feel out of the loop.

10. I made this two weeks ago. It was was so easy and so delicious- I need to make more tarts. Plus pretty, an important quality in food (see above- blogger was being weird).

A Summer of Learning

[source]

Alternate title: How to live with a third roommate who can't feed himself, control his bowels, or talk. 

I know summer isn't officially over yet, but as I go back to work tomorrow it might as well be (although I'd appreciate it if we could get a little cooler, temperature-wise). This time of year always leaves me feeling a little reflective- last summer I had an awesomely busy, fabulous break (Florida! The Caribbean! Riding the bike trail! Yoga! Pool time! Happy hours! Friends!), while this one has been a lot slower paced. What I've learned:

To be more flexible

I'm a pretty disciplined, structured person (just ask my students) and I am a huge fan of schedules and routines. If I say I'm going to read for thirty minutes and hit the treadmill for forty, that's what I do. I thought that would neatly carry over into motherhood- feedings, sleeping, activity time, etc... And it has to a point- we have a loose schedule we follow each day. But I'm not quite as uptight in terms of timing- if I'm changing his diaper and he's having a great time being naked I let him hang for a few extra minutes. If he and his dad are having one of their lengthy "conversations" I hold off on nap time or bed time until they're done. If the kid is hungry after two hours instead of three hours, then he gets to eat. We're all happy with this- he's a happy baby, he's gaining weight, and we're pretty well- rested (minus those few bad nights I had earlier this week... ouch).

Good friends stick around

I'm used to seeing my friends often, whether meeting up at someone's house, going to happy hours, or going out. I was a little apprehensive about how things would work with a baby in the mix, especially with those that don't have kids. Luckily everyone, for the most part, has been really understanding and accommodating. I don't see them as often by any means, but that's okay.  We've had friends offer to babysit, make us food, drop by to visit, and send texts to check in when they get the vibe that things are tough.

My mom friends are awesome

I have several friends, that are moms, who are a wealth of information. They have been so helpful at either validating what I'm doing or offering gentle suggestions. Once Sawyer screamed himself hoarse during bath time (which he now loves), a friend assured me that one of her kids had done the same during a crying fit of her own. My own mom has also been incredibly useful. 

To make nap times count

For the most part nap times are productive- exercise, house cleaning, laundry, or planning for the up-coming year. But sometimes you need to sleep. 

To make sound effects for everything and toys out of anything

Sawyer is at the age where he's starting to distract pretty easy- bad for feeding times, great when he's crying. Diaper changes are made fun by flailing around diapers in his face (sooooo funny, apparently). Stubborn onesies that won't fit over his head are accompanied by weird noises from me. 

Bad habits can be broken fairly easily

Sleeping in the swing became sleeping in the Pack-n-Play. Naps in my arms became naps alone (for him... not me). Swaddling both arms became swaddled with one arm (and neither in the next month or two). Rocking/nursing/walking to sleep became him falling asleep on his own. And so on and so forth. I used to beat myself up over things (and probably will continue to do so in the future), but now that I know with some determination things can always be changed.

To stick to my guns

You will nap- even if we have to repeat the "laying down" process a few times. You will get in 40-60 minutes of tummy time a day, whether in five minute spurts or twenty minute blocks. You will stay in the Ergo in Target, even if you're pissed. We will take baths at least every other night. 

That having a boy is totally fine

I really wanted a girl when I found out I was pregnant. When I learned I was having a boy I was a little bummed- a feeling that at least partially carried over up until Sawyer was born (not like depressed, just like "aw that little dress is so cute I wish I could buy it" sort of bummed). But now, I can't imagine anything else! Little preppy boy's clothes are the cutest (onesie polos are the best).

That I'm still me

I've obviously changed because I've had a kid- my Instagram feed is now comprised of 90% baby pictures, as opposed to dogs, alcoholic beverages, and pictures of hikes/bike rides. I talk about him all the time, and the five(ish) pounds still attached to me ass are a constant reminder. But I still get out with my friends, still partake in the hobbies I enjoy, and talk to my husband about things that don't concern the kid (we've even managed to go out, alone, once a month or so, too).

Things I'm still learning:

To stop comparing

This comes to me in terms of my time-management, post-pregnancy body (those last few pounds require so much effort to shed...), and baby's development (he'll do things when he gets there!).

To put away my phone

I've gotten a lot better about this when I'm with him- when I'm playing with Sawyer the phone goes away unless I'm taking pictures of him or texting occasionally. Web browsing, blog reading, and Pinterest pinning is for later, while breastfeeding or when he's napping.

To accept breastfeeding/pumping

I know, probably TMI for some, but I really don't enjoy this aspect of motherhood. I like spending time with him when he's calm and content, but this whole thing is such a commitment. I don't want him to get older, but I do fantasize about him turning one and being able to send him downstairs with my husband in the morning so that I can sleep (to like 8 or- gasp!- 9!) and he can drink a bottle of good old cow's milk. But right now it's so much cheaper and better for him- I hope it all works when going back to work.

So, here we are. Last summer I learned to love the Moscow Mule, this year I learned how to live with a baby. In my house. Using my stuff. Spending my money. 

 

Three Months In

[this is old; multiply the leg chunk by at least two]

It's a baby/mom post. You've been warned. 

Last week marked Sawyer's three month milestone, and I must say, the difference between a brand spankin' newborn baby and a three month old infant is crazy. It's not easy by any means, but it definitely is easier. Every month or so I'm going to do a post like this, just so that when I go back and work on his baby book (I'm going to start... soon) I have the info easily accessible. Plus I like to talk about my kid.

Daily Schedule

I thought I'd be a lot more rigid when it came to his schedule, but I'm not. I've found that if he takes one nap before lunch (forty-five minutes or so) and one longer one after (an hour and a half to two and and half hours), both in his Pack-n-Play, with a few little cat naps sprinkled throughout he's good. He eats every three hours, but if he's hungry earlier I let him eat. The tried and true pattern is generally sleep, eat, play, repeat. He sleeps for about eight or nine hours at night, with the first chunk happening while we're still up, followed by a six, or more, hour stretch. He's a pretty happy kid, so it works.

Big Changes

We made the rookie mistake of letting him sleep at night in his swing starting the third night he was home (desperation and sleep deprivation, people!) and it was MAGICAL! Unfortunately, he was born with a slight tightening in a neck muscle (totally fixable with some stretching exercises) that was just diagnosed, so we've had to transition him to sleeping in his Pack-n-Play at night (he'll go to his crib in his room when it cools down at night- we have a whole house fan and there's no way I'm letting my baby sleep alone in a room with the window open). The first three nights were rough- I woke up one night at four and let out a long string of expletives that would have made a sailor proud (going from sleeping seven hours straight to three is just plain bad). Fast forward a week and he's in the thing for at least six hours straight. Just in time for work!

Speaking of work, that starts a week from Monday. He had a trial run at the daycare last week and it went so much better than expected. I only cried for like ten minutes! Oh, and he was fine too. I love being with him everyday but do miss being around people. Push and pull... I'm having a hard time with the idea of letting someone I don't know very well (she comes highly recommended, is very experienced, my nephews went to her, my mother-in-law has taught her kids, etc...) handle my kid for seven or eight hours a day (although he'll hopefully nap for like half of that), but I know after a few weeks of seeing that he's fine I will be too. If he enjoys a roof over his head and diapers on his butt he'll learn to love it.

Developmental Junk

- Holds his head up well, despite the neck thing

- Fascinated by hands- constantly in his mouth

- Starting to grab for things

- Baffled by the existence of his feet

- Rolled over twice now, from front to back, but still a little confused about how to move his upper body and lower body at the same time

- Starting to jabber nonstop! The day after daycare he "talked" the entire way home, presumably telling me about his time, of course. He also has become a bit of a complainer, which is so much cuter than smiling

- I try to read to him every day. We (okay me) love Skippy John Jones Goes to Spice, Dragons Love Tacos, and Boy + Bot

- He loves me, of course, but he has really taking a liking to his dad lately, which is pretty damn cute

- Fiftieth percentile in weight, ninetieth in height (he gained two pounds in less than three weeks!)

- He's starting to laugh which is basically the cutest thing ever

- He has gone from hating bath time to tolerating it to loving it. He pretty much thinks being naked is the best thing ever- exhibitionist! 

Etc...

- I feel this intense, unnecessary, need to decide if I'm going to have another baby. We're in fact not deciding now, but I think about it constantly, especially as I'm boxing up clothes he's outgrown.

- I'm very thankful that my body was completely ruined by this little guy but am frustrated with the fact that I'm going to have to start working a tiny bit harder to lose these last pounds. The summer makes me want to not exercise and eat ice cream- not a good combo.

- I really, really want a few drinks (I do! I've been sober for almost a year!) but that means I'd waste precious breastmilk and am too stingy to do so. I'm tentatively planning on doing this until he's a year, which means nine more months! Augh! That also makes it so that I'm basically not allowed to sleep in until then- double augh!

- I've tried to get out a lot lately and it's been good for us both- he likes to see new places and things. We've also had his grandma watch him so we could go out alone, and my husband has been watching him sometimes so I can escape to fun places... like Target. 

- I'm so looking forward to the holidays this year- Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas. Time off! Cooler weather! Dressing up my kid in a ridiculous costume of my choice! Buying him a little red wagon (yes, I already know what I'm getting him for Christmas)! Taking him to see lights! 

- I really, really love this kid. It's corny and the pre-baby me would have said it's bullshit, but it really is a different sort of love than you have for everyone else (yes, including my fur-children). I totally get how moms have lifted cars off their kids before (although I don't get why cars were on their kids in the first place...). It's insane how happy his fat little smiling face makes me. 

We are What We Google

I don't know how many times I've silently thanked whomever that my Google searches are relatively private, minus the government, the people at Google, and whatever internet fairies put the banner ads on the sides of websites. Good God, if people only knew some of the stuff I look up they'd be disgusted, horrified, and probably really amused. And that would just be on one day (although not everyday).

What one Googles is quite reflective of their life- where they're at at that moment. For example, the girl that Googles "morning after pill" obviously had a lapse in responsibility the night before (and hopefully doesn't work for Hobby Lobby). The student who desperately searches for essay help the night before a paper is due shows some issues with procrastination. The wife or mother who frantically tries to find "quick recipes with chicken" is probably feeling rushed and over-extended. The man who frantically types in his current medical symptoms is obviously not feeling well, and may possibly be a hypochondriac. We can learn about a person's interests, desires, questions, and fears. We are what we Google, I guess. 

I frequently try to recall a time where we didn't have such a wealth of knowledge at our fingertips and had to actually work at acquiring the answers to our questions. As a young girl I had to find things in the encyclopedia, ask my parents, or search the library when I had a question. Sometimes I simply didn't land on an answer, either. I don't know when the last time I had a question that I couldn't find answers to on the internet. I'm thankful for the plethora of information, but I can't help to feel guilty for the un-worked for abundance. I wonder if this ridiculous level of access makes us cocky or whether it makes us smarter. Or both.  

So what have I Googled lately? What does it mean?

How much Tylenol to give two month old before shots? Sawyer got his vaccines on Wednesday, so I was trying to be proactive. I couldn't figure it out because of the new concentration and whatnot so I didn't do it. Big mistake...

Sub 2:15 half marathon plans- I'm delusional (but motivated?).

Chateau Lake Louise- Banff Canada-I showed my husband and told him that it would take twenty-four hours to drive there. He surprised me with actually being interested. Some day!

Extra bone in foot pain- Along with running comes the pain in my right ankle. There's really no fix, except surgery.

Muppet yourself- A student and I were talking about what we'd look like as Muppets. We thought there'd be an app- there's not.

What would I look like as the opposite sex- This came from the above conversation... But seriously. What would the masculine version of someone with the exact same DNA look like?

Exersaucer vs jumpers- There's a big debate. I'm trying to give a shit.

The LEGO Movie Sea Cow set- Depending on how much we are able to spend on each other this year, I really want to get this for my husband (who supposedly doesn't read this).

Better to water grass in morning or at night?- In the morning, since apparently certain fungi can grow at night. 

Fourth of July Pie Recipes- I'm trying to be a tiny bit festive.

Orange is the New Black Cast- I was talking about it with a friend and couldn't remember how to spell Poussey (who is gorgeous, don't you think?).

Allergic to white gold after pregnancy- My finger under my wedding rings has developed this horrible dermatitis since having the baby. I'm not wearing them right now and hoping once it clears up I can start wearing them again and just being super careful about drying my hands better. I know dipping them in platinum is an option, but it's not in the budget and I really don't want to.

Bedrock City, Arizona- My husband told me about this super sad Flinstones amusement park that I had to check out (only $5 to get in!). If I was in the area I would most definitely stop by.

Does Gatorade help lactation?- Um, yeah. And no, probably not, in case you were wondering.

Name of guy buying my spin bike from Craig's List- Just in case he was an escaped convict or something. He was actually a very nice fire fighter. 

I'm weird and maybe a little boring. 

So what have you searched recently? What does it say about you? Are we becoming lazy or smarter?

One Month Reflections

Disclaimer: Baby post. It's been awhile, so I'd thought I'd give an update on the reason why my blog posts have decreased!

Sawyer turned one-month-old yesterday and I'm torn between "ohmygod it's going so fast" and "holy crap, every day is slow and exactly the same, and I can't wait until you can play with LEGOS and go to the science museum with me" Before having him I accepted the fact that being a parent would be hard and the first six weeks would be excruciating. I don't think they've been as bad as I've thought, but here's a rundown:

Sleep

Sleep, I miss you so! These days I'm lucky to get sleep in 2.5 hour blocks- a few times I've gotten three straight and it's been glorious. Sawyer has to eat every four hours at night (at first it was 2-3 when he was born, since he lost a bit of weight), although he generally can't go that long and wakes up himself. For example, he'll wake up at 3, I'll nurse him for thirty or so minutes, change his diaper, and then spend another ten or so getting him back to sleep. It was even longer, but I stopped supplementing with a bottle as much at night. I'm getting used to it, but the first week or two was brutal. Luckily he doesn't wake up cranky- there's very little to no crying at night, just big wide-open eyes.

Feeding

I don't want to get too into it, but breastfeeding is hard. I've had some trouble in terms of producing enough, meaning I've had to give him a little formula (which I'm totally okay with) and have had to throw in some pumping session during the day to get things moving (which has worked some). I generally spend about seven or eight hours on feeding-related activities a day. The mental burden has been the worst part- if things had worked easily it would have been better, but I'm trying to go with it. Four weeks in things have gotten better, but I look forward to the day where I can hopefully cut the supplementing and extra pumping out. I'd like to commit to breastfeeding until he's six or eight months, but we'll see. All I know is that if someone else says "breast is best" to me I might punch them in the face.

Sawyer

I'm not going to lie- the first two or three weeks Sawyer was a bit boring. He was sweet and cuddly and cute, but we were pretty much on the feed/eat/sleep/cry occasionally routine. In the past week he's awake a bit more and has started noticing things around him a little bit, specifically the mobile attached to the bouncer he hangs out in every morning while I tend to the dogs and eat breakfast. He's not smiling on purpose quite yet, but he is starting to make sweet little cooing noises and does show his feisty side by arching his back and giving an occasional frustrated old-man grunt. He sighs after his sneezes and screams bloody murder during his baths. He loves the Metallica lullaby CD and once sat, awake, through me reading six books to him. He has potential. And I have to say, I have probably never kissed anyone as much as I have this little guy's chubby cheeks.

Worry
I worry about everything anyway and did a damn good job staying calm during my pregnancy. I'm trying to channel that calm, though, when it comes to not freaking out about the crazy sounds newborns make while breathing at night. Or when he screams himself hoarse and sounds like he smokes two packs a day (this is happening right now, actually). I'm trying not to think about sending him to daycare and the provider not knowing what he likes and needs. I try to not weight him every day after he lost almost a pound the first few days after birth. Luckily our pediatrician is amazing and as long as the kid is eating, pooping, and breathing he's probably fine. 

The Dogs

I have yet to experience "mommy-guilt," but do very much feel bad for the dogs. They were used to at least six solid walks a week and are now down to four or five. They have yet to go in the pool (I'm seriously considering telling some of my students that they can come use my pool if they'll take my dogs in it with them... and dry them off)  and seem to be generally pretty bored. I know I'm projecting, as dogs are generally pretty lazy creatures during the summer, but still. I try to pay attention to them as much as possible, even if it's for just a quick belly rub, but it is something I feel bad about.

Work

I really miss work. I hate the fact that my seniors are starting their last week and I'm not there. I hate the fact that someone else is running my class. I hate the fact that my friends are there and I am not. 

Mental Health

I am incredibly thankful that I didn't have to deal with post-partum depression, which I was a little bit worried about since I do have some of the risk factors. I did have a few moments that involved tears, "why did I do this?" and "my life is going to suck for the next few years!" thoughts, and copious amounts of cookies. This was primarily in week two, though, after the novelty of the new toy had worn off and exhaustion had set in (I'm sure there are some hormonal factors as well). My husband was wonderful- he listened, took the baby so I could get stuff done and nap, and bought more cookies. While I still do have moments of frustration, I'm in a good place and think I'm handling things well now! 

Post-Partum Weight and Whatnot

First of all, labor and delivery is disgusting. The things that your body goes through is just... ugh. Gross. Luckily, a lot of that nastiness leads to weight loss! Hurray! I gained almost thirty-five pounds and was down twelve by the time I got home. Within two weeks I had lost twenty and I'm now down somewhere around twenty-five. Things are definitely a little mushier, but I can get on some of my old jeans and for that I am happy. I know these last ten are going to have to be earned, but this side of it has been a lot easier than I thought, and I'm thinking that staying active up until the day before I delivered was part of it (in my expert opinion, of course). I am very, very antsy to being more active, though. I see the doctor for my six-week check up soon and will begin running once she says okay (I'm sure I could now, but since it's been so long since I've really trained I want to make sure I'm completely ready). And hopefully I can squeeze in a yoga class here or there! This has been really hard on me- I feel like I was more active at nine months pregnant than I am now. I know patience is key right now...

Other Adjustments

Not doing things is not an option for me, so I've had to re-prioritize what gets done when. In terms of getting out of the house I've made an effort in the last week or two to get out more alone with the baby and we've both survived. I bought a Baby Ergo, which he loves. The only problem is that we both get kind of warm and with summer coming I'm not sure how much use I'll get out of it. And yes, I totally have fantasies about strapping him on and doing some serious walking on the treadmill...  

So, in a nutshell: this has been hard, but not as hard as I thought, my baby is slightly less boring than he was before, and I need exercise or I might shoot myself. 

Moms! When did your baby start sleeping in longer chunks or through the night?

Non-Moms! What cocktail are you drinking on my behalf?

Where the Wild Things Are Nursery (Finished!)

Sawyer's room has really been quite the process and is probably the most complete room in the house. There was a lot of discussion as to what the theme would be- we didn't want something too babyish or something too mature. I'm not sure when he'll outgrow this, but I think we have awhile! Anyway, we both love the book, and the movie, so this is where we landed. 

My husband can be credited with the bulk of the mural- he did the drawing (most freehand) and much of the black outlining. After I proved myself I was allowed to help with the color painting and did some additional outlining as well. He also did the silhouette canvases on the side wall. The only thing I can completely really take credit for are the decoupaged letters! To this day I'm still impressed with his talent and willingness to put in a "don't think about the total" amount of hours into it. The entire thing was definitely a labor of love (and taking on something that ended up being a longer process than we thought). 

A quick overview of the process (excuse the lighting and iPhone photography):

[From start to finish]

Some of the details:

All the furniture is pretty much from IKEA, except after hours and hours of searching for a crib I found this one bundled with a mattress for a really reasonable price from Wal-Mart, so I decided to jump off the Target bandwagon and order it there. Eventually we'll get a rug and hang some of his baby pictures on the fourth wall that's not shown up there. 

It's not perfect, but I really have to admit that I love the finished product!

Bookish (and not so Bookish) Thoughts

Link up below!

Honestly, considering I have a five-day-old my only thoughts right now are pretty baby-centric. So, humor me this week!

1. Tonight was the big IB Celebration at work, and I was able to go! My husband stayed with Sawyer in my classroom so I could feed him before and after, which worked well. It went quite a bit over time, so I left early, which made me a little sad to miss all the kids afterwards. But still better than nothing!

2. Sawyer is much more alert and awake than I thought he would be (not bad thing). Today I was able to put him in the Pack n' Play for 45 minutes while I got ready and did some thing and he was totally content to stare out the window. Night time is a different story... last night he got eight hours in with only two wake-ups that were pretty short. Fingers crossed for a repeat tonight.

3. I hate discussing bodily functions with others. Giving birth and then having a newborn has forced me to, and, well, I still hate it. 

4. I cut Sawyer's umbilical cord- I'm unabashedly proud.

5. Delivering a baby is the best diet plan ever! Seventeen pounds in five days! I'll take it!

6. We didn't really name him after anyone, we were just... inspired.

7. Is it bad that I find his super loud, super sad cry during sponge baths a little funny?

8. It's weird to not really have any obligations right now. Nothing pressing, at least. Sometimes I love it, sometimes it's a little hard to swallow. I know maternity leave will go by fast, though, so I need to enjoy every second of the next fourteen or so weeks with this little guy.

9. I'm so amused when people try to figure out who he looks like. I'm horrible with that kind of stuff. He looks like.... a baby.

10. Without going into too much detail, my water broke between second and third period at work, but I didn't realize it was that, so I kept working. My Braxton Hicks were a bit more intense that normal, and then regular, but I just kept working... And then drove home. After work I called the doctor and she said I needed to go to the hospital. I was in some serious denial- we even stopped at Target on the way to the hospital. 

So I Had a Baby...

Sawyer Benjamin [last name] was born on April 25th at 7:33 am. He weighed 7 pounds, 4 ounces and was 19 inches long. 

The delivery wasn't exactly a walk in the park, but could have been a million times worse, so I'm thankful for the experience I had. The hospital was fairly dumpy, but our nurses were fantastic. 

We're back at home adjusting now. He's a pretty mellow kid, but isn't a fan of nighttime sleeping, as to be expected. The dogs are getting used to the hairless little puppy- Cordie loves him, but Chomsky is a little depressed. My husband has been nothing short of awesome and our "no visitors for the first two days" policy was both respected and exactly what we needed. 

I've read a few pages here and there (Lolita for me, Corduroy for Sawyer) and promise not to neglect things here (too much). I'll be back with Bookish (and not so Bookish) Thoughts in a few days and my normal monthly reviews.

Bookish (and not so Bookish) Thoughts

Link up below!

1. On Easter Sunday my husband and I drove to Santa Monica and walked around for a bit (we don't generally do much for the holiday). I want a sailboat. 

2. As I was driving by John Wayne (the airport, not the cowboy) and seeing the planes come in I thought about that feeling I always get when we're about to land- disappointment. Not because I wanted to crash, but because I like the time up in the air. I like being able to read or sleep and to know that I can't do anything about anything back on land. The detachment and helplessness are welcomed breaks from reality.

3. Check out Army Amy's cool idea in this post.

4. Dear people of the world: if we have never talked about my reproductive system before, we're not now. Please don't ask about the state of my cervix. 

5. In Style says overalls are coming back in style. I really hope this is true.

6. I had a funnel cake sundae over the weekend- it was just as bit fantastic as I thought it would be. 

7. Saturday our neighborhood was swarmed with butterflies- it was beautiful. Apparently in a small canyon-type area near our house the Painted Lady variety burst forth from their cocoons and started flying north. As I walked last night I saw several caterpillars that didn't really get the message.

8. Do you ever get annoyed when there's nothing new on Instagram or Facebook? Do you ever get annoyed where there is?

9. I really love it when I get emails from my brother, who is deployed out in the Pacific somewhere. They're fairly consistent, but it's nice to hear from him.

10. Prepping for maternity leave was no joke- I finally finished today. At this point I could have the baby tonight (noooooooooo don't come!) and my sub would have everything he needed for the rest of the year. My room is trashed and I have a ton of grading left, but there would be stuff to keep everyone busy.

 

Bookish (and not so Bookish) Thoughts

Link up below!

1. My classes are still processing and mourning the tragic bus crash that happened last Thursday night. It's been a challenge to keep pushing them academically, with the IB test being in just a few short weeks. It makes me feel so guilty to talk about the Scarlet Letter when their friend just died a horrible death. But if we don't move forward they won't be prepared and dwelling isn't necessarily the healthiest thing for them. It's just a tough, tough situation.

2. Our school was in the media once again for a bogus bomb threat this morning- we had to wait outside the campus for over an hour to be let back in. Seriously, universe, just leave us alone.

3. Time to get a little less serious:

4. My husband and I went to the hospital orientation meeting tonight (I figured at 37.5 weeks it was probably time, I suppose) and while the hospital is a little more progressive than I thought, it's still dumpy. I went to give birth somewhere fresh and shiny and new.

5. I wish I went to Coachella a couple of years ago, back when I wasn't pregnant and it hadn't sold out yet.

6. Have you heard of oil pulling? I don't get it.

7. I started Lolita over the weekend and I must confess to having trouble getting into it. Granted I am a bit busy right now and have yet to sit down for a substantial block of time, so hopefully I can commit some time this weekend to it.

8. One of my friends and I are going to a restaurant dedicated to funnel cake this weekend. I can't believe I've gone so long not knowing it existed. The horror that would have been if I had never gotten that Groupon (that I didn't even buy). The best part if that I'm going after I FINALLY DYE MY HAIR AGAIN! God, I've been waiting for like 26 weeks to do this.

[source]

9. Poor Andre Johnson. Poor Andre Johnson's penis. Poor guy thought he wasn't going to need it in the place he was going next, but now, well, now he's in a bit of a conundrum. 

10. Those bastards at Target finally got me with their stupid Red Card ATM. I started doing the math on diapers and figured it was smart. Unless I buy them at Costco. Then I just caved in for no reason.

Bookish (and not so Bookish) Thoughts

Link up below!

1. Prom is Friday night! Part of me is excited (I get to dress up, see my kids in a different setting, it's a minimum day), part of me is not at all looking forward to driving 45 miles to Orange County, and back, alone on a Friday night. I plan on using the tips from this article.

2. Reading a pastiche of your writing would be downright horrible. Sort of like watching or listening to yourself, but worse.

3. I kinda sorta fell down the stairs on Sunday (like maybe five or six steps). I'm fine, the baby's fine, but holy crap falling with that additional weight is no joke. I don't think I've ever made the sound that came out of my mouth before.

4. I'm really trying to enjoy the time left that I have with my students (hopefully 17 days of work, but two are training days and one is senior ditch day), but all the pressure to have them ready for the IB test on May 5 sort of puts a damper on things. 

5. I hate teenagers that aren't "my own." I was out the other day and overheard a group of them talking and they were so effing annoying. I actually sort of feel that way about random kids I don't know in general. Dogs, not at all. I'll pet anyone's dog.

6. After ordering the Fitbit Force forever ago, and then somehow missing the email that they were discontinuing them, my Flex arrived the other day and I'm obsessed. I'm totally a stats/numbers person, so the fact that I can now monitor my steps, sleep, and calories from one app is just too much. 

7. I started reading The World's Strongest Librarian by Josh Hanagarne the other day and am really enjoying it so far, granted I'm only twenty pages in. His humor, honesty, and love of books have won me over. I haven't gotten to the point were he's been diagnosed with Tourrette's quite yet, but I'm sure that will be fascinating as well.

8. Back in the day I really loved No Doubt (well, Tragic Kingdom, at least). Now, as an adult I can't stand them. I literally shutter when "I'm Just a Girl" comes on the radio. 

9. Let me get political for just a second. Today I saw an article on Facebook from Thought Catalog called "18 Things White People Seem to Not Understand (Because, White Privilege)" and was a little irritated after reading it. In fact, I hate the term "white privilege" in general. Sorry for having two parents that were white? Sorry because, history? Sure, I've never felt prejudice, but I've felt other negative emotions. My life has not been all rainbows and butterflies- my "white privilege" has not created a bubble that I get to reside it.  I get it, there are things I don't understand because I'm not of color, but it's not my fault. Isn't there something slightly hypocritical about demeaning one color (and being condescending) because the other colors have been demeaned? What else should I feel guilty about that I can't control? And in the area of Southern California where I live I am the minority, for the record. I understand that this may not exactly jive with my typical liberal-minded ways, but don't give me shit for something that I can't control.

10. I haven't colored my hair since a week before I got pregnant and am finally letting myself in a week. I may be slightly more excited about that then actually having my baby. Is that bad? My roots are ridiculous. 

A Bookish (Surprise) Baby Shower

I've always been pretty vocal about not wanting a baby shower- I've turned down family and well-intentioned friends over the last few months. Two of my very good friends decided they had other ideas, though, and threw me a surprise book-themed one over the weekend. It was incredibly thoughtful and they took great care to make it something that I would like (and I did)- there weren't any games, they tracked down friends they didn't know well, scouted out my Pinterest boards to see what foods I'd like, and consulted my husband on the logistics (it was a coed shower, but really just felt like a lot of great people hanging out with good food and baby gifts). And it was bookish! They had everyone sign a copy of Where the Wild Things Are and bring a book. There were book quotes printed and framed throughout the house and even the invitation and favors were book-related.

Admittedly, I go through great lengths to not let people do things for me. I decline help, I refuse to ask for things, and I hate feeling like an imposition. The fact that these girls, and everyone else who took time out of their busy lives to attend, were willing to go through such trouble for me (I guess the planning started a few months ago!) meant so, so, so much. It was one of those days that I needed someone to do something nice for me... and boy did I get hit the jackpot! I had absolutely no idea that they had planned it, and the little comments they had made over the last few weeks totally threw my off course. I'm so incredibly lucky to have these people in my life! 

The snarky sarcasm will be back soon, I promise.  

March Reviews

[it's spring break!]

Don't worry, I'm not going to try to BS you with some sort of April Fool's joke. I will, however, try to BS you with my opinions of what I read this month.

Five Days at Memorial by Sheri Fink

576 pages

I already reviewed this more extensively here, but basically this non-fiction text chronicles the five days after Hurricane Katrina at Memorial Medical Center in New Orleans. Doctors and nurses were faced with some serious ethical dilemmas that resulted with a tad bit of euthenasia. 

Verdict: I found this book incredibly interesting and read it within four or so days, despite it's length. Like any piece of non-fiction I think it's important to keep in mind it's objectivity, but for the most part I think Fink did a good job.

The House at the End of Hope Street by Menna van Praag

320 pages

I also reviewed this already here, summarizing the story of a woman who "finds" a house that will "help" her get her life on track after a relationship with a professor goes bad.

Verdict: I really didn't care for it much, thinking that it was a bit silly and the ending a disappointment.

Heart of Darkness by Joseph Conrad

72 pages

I reread this for work, having read it back in high school as an IB student (some things never change...). I appreciated the story and language much more this time as we followed Marlow down the Congo. 

Verdict: This is a tough read, even as an adult. The language is dense, the plot moves a bit slowly and the description is plentiful. That being said, I think it's a rich text that I'm glad I had the opportunity to reread and change my mind on. 

4:09:32 by Hal Higdon

168 pages

Let's just call this month of the cop out- I also reviewed this book here.

Verdict: This is definitely a book for the running community, so despite my hiatus from the field, I was interested by the look back at what it took to prepare for Boston and how the bombings impacted them.

The Happiest Baby on the Block by Harvey Karp, MD

260 pages

Karp outlines his plan for getting your baby to shut up and sleep more with his 5 S's- swaddling, side-laying, shushing, swinging, and sucking. He provides practical reasoning, historical connections, and scientific evidence. His theories on colic are also pretty interesting.

Verdict: I obviously don't have much to go off of, considering I don't have a kid and Chomsky got really frustrated when I tried to swaddle him and rock him vigorously. It does seem to make some sense, though. 

 

1,396 pages

 

Read anything good this month? Or anything we should stay away from?

 

Bookish (and not so Bookish) Thoughts

Hello! Link up below! Thanks to everyone who participates and links back!

Warning: It's another baby Bookish (and not so Bookish) Thoughts. I haven't had one since January, and since I'm at 33+ weeks we're getting into the home stretch!

1. While I have no way of knowing if I'll have a natural, medicated, or surgical birth, I do know what I want in terms of visitors. Quick visits in the hospital are fine, but the first 2-3 days at home I want it to be just the three of us and the dogs. There's a few reasons. First of all, as soon as someone, I don't care who, walks through my door I feel like I have to be a host. Secondly, I deal best with change without feeling like I'm being watched. And thirdly, I'm expecting to feel (and look) like shit, so a few days of living in a little bubble will be necessary. I of course appreciate that people will want to come over and meet little [insert baby name here], and I'll definitely want to show him off, I just need a few days! I know it may seem harsh and may not work for some families.

2. When it comes to buying what we need I feel like we're in good shape. All the big items have been purchased, as well as many of the smaller things. We still have to decide on a monitor, the whole video vs. no video being a deciding factor right now. I usually pick up a few things here and there when I'm out and about so that it doesn't seem like we're blowing a ton of money (although we have, collectively). If the baby was born tomorrow we'd be fine.

3. I mentioned the other day that my husband is hard at work on painting the Where the Wild Things Are mural- that shit takes some serious time. I can't wait for the final product. I think I'm going to start putting together the rocker and toy organizer this weekend, but he'll have to handle the dresser (the crib is already assembled). Within a few weeks we should be set.

4. I'm proud to say that I'm still walking the dogs nearly every day for at least thirty minutes (plus walking on the treadmill and a prenatal strength training video)! My golden is super easy to handle (she barely needs a leash), but the lab is always a little unpredictable (the dog loves, or maybe hates, cats and other dogs). I'm really, really hoping to do it up until the end, even if it just means a few laps around our small blocks instead of the larger routes I normally take.

5. I need to research vaccinations. My child will be fully vaccinated, but I am interested in at least looking at a more modified schedule. Maybe. Nonetheless, whatever we decide, I want to be well-informed.

[It's gotten crazy!]

6. I'm due on May 5 (and am measuring right on time) and am crossing everything that can cross that he doesn't come before, or on, April 30 (well, I guess anytime after like 9pm is okay). That night is my students' IB Celebration, a night where they are all recognized for all their accomplishments. It's such a nice night- they dress up, the principal and counselors say nice things about them, each kid's college acceptances are highlighted and everyone gets all nostalgic and sentimental. I've gone the past two years, when they were recognized as AP sophomores and IB juniors, but this is the big year. And I want to be there. HEAR THAT BABY???

7. We haven't toured the hospital, confirmed with the pediatrician that they're taking new patients, or looked into adding the baby to our insurance. I also need to decide if we're doing a newborn photo shoot. Maybe next week.

8. People really love to tell you that you're life is going to change and you're "not going to be able to do [insert usually fun thing] anymore" once the baby is here. Okay. Got it. Thanks. 

9. It's weird to look at the end of April and have to adjust what I'm willing to sign up for. Douglas Coupland has a reading in LA towards the end of the month and I decided I probably should skip it. Same with the LA Times Festival of Books- the lineup didn't impress me much, so I'm going to not go this year. 

10. Something I am going to? Prom. Yup, I'll be almost 37 weeks pregnant, chaperoning a few hundred kids out on Balboa Island (forty so miles away). Trying to find a dress to wear was a little depressing, but my students' excitement (despite the elaborate "promposals" that are happening) is pretty sweet. I'm excited for them.