Bookish (and not so Bookish) Thoughts

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I must preface this post with the fact that it is baby/pregnancy related. If that's not your thing I totally get it and just want to assure you this will not be the norm. I'm getting it out of my system... for now (the thoughts... not the baby). And thank you for the well wishes on my post the other day- yay for babies!

1. Dear world, stop asking childless people if they plan on having kids. If they never want them they don't want to feel obligated to justify themselves. If it's not the right time they don't want to feel pressured. And if they've been trying for months and months they really don't want the reminder. 

[the most serious someecard I've ever seen]
2. We will definitely find out the gender. And if it's a girl there will be absolutely no princess shirts or hair bows larger than say a silver dollar. I'm sure your daughter looks adorable in her "I'm the Princess" t-shirt with her hair bow the size of her face, but that's not my style. And considering I have limited time in which I get to impose my fashion beliefs on her you can bet your ass I'm going to take advantage (overalls 24/7). If it's a boy he can wear princess shirts and huge bows. Whatever.

[the size of the kid's face; source... sorry]
3. I refuse to make any promises about anything. I mean I'm not going to smoke crack or go skydiving, but that's about it. Visitors the first few days after birth? Don't count on it. Breastfeeding? Who knows! Epidural? We'll see! My point is that I've never done any of this before, so I'm basically taking it one thing at a time.

4. I'm not having a large family baby shower, so I guess that is one promise I'm making. I despise baby showers with every ounce of my being and have worked hard to get out of many- subjecting others to the torture just seems wrong (as does having one solely to get free baby gear). I hate being the center of attention, I hate games ("you know what, let's not even wait 'til I say "baby"- just take my fucking clothespin now"), and I hate being at large social events where I can't drink alcohol. I'm not opposed to a small get together with friends, but that's not even something I have my heart set on. 

5. I'm still so relieved about the timing of this whole thing. I'm due the first week in May, meaning I'll get to teach my students all the way up until their IB and AP tests (I'm actually due on the IB test) and then let them go full-blown senioritis on a sub. If things go okay I'll come back in June for senior check out day and graduation (my students are already asking to see the kid, claiming it's "like a sibling to them," but again, no promises), but other than that I'll get to be home for three months before going back to work at the start of the next school year. 

6. Working at the UCLA Medical Center for four years has completely ruined me in terms of my hospital expectations. My area has shitty, shitty, shitty options- it would almost be better to deliver my baby in an alley behind a Chinese restaurant. And no, I'm no switching to Kaiser- UCLA also taught me HMOs are something I'd like to stay very far away from.

[UCLA is only 65 miles away... source]
7. I'm very excited to take up running again postpartum. I gave it up a year and a half or so ago because I was legitimately burnt out, but then never really picked it back up because we were trying to get pregnant. I turned to yoga and did a lot of hiking/incline walking, and then eventually cycling, but I do miss the idea of training for something. I've already got my eye on a comeback half marathon in the future. 

8. My husband and I have had a few conversations about kids and social media these days- we both find it alarming how prevalent young children are on the internet, but understand that it really is a personal decision. I'd never put my kid's face on public domain, meaning the blog or twitter. I'll also work to cull my Facebook friends list between now and then- if I wouldn't talk to you on the street then you're out. We also plan to talk to family and friends about it as well- I hate it when I see people post pictures of other peoples' kids without permission. Not all parents want their kids plastered on the internet for strangers to see. I know it's harmless, but still. I don't know if your friend from biology class back in high school is now a pedophile. Food for thought.


9. I don't want to hear about your labor experience. Maybe eventually, but not yet. I don't want to hear about how you had an epidural... or that you didn't. How you're lady parts were decimated. That you spent twenty-four hours in labor. I just don't. I'm quite aware that it can suck hardcore and really don't need any reminders.

10. I am not concerned whatsoever with how our dogs will do. I know that is a very valid concern in some houses, but I know Cordie and Chomsky will be just fine. We're working on getting the barking under control, but other than that I don't anticipate any baby-mauling.



18 comments:

  1. #1. Thank you!
    #4. High five! I have been to countless baby showers (last week I went to one for a woman I had met ONCE) and have spent a small fortune on gifts. Being Childless by Choice, I will never see a return on my gifting. Although I am considering registering and having a house shower when we move :). And that selfishness is why I'm not a mommy.

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    1. You totally need to have a housewarming party or some sort of open house! As long as no one spills on new carpet or a new couch or something.

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  2. I kind of love giant bows. My bff's little girl wears 'em big. She had to wear a helmet for a few months (she was a preemie and ended up with a flat heat from laying down in the nicu for weeks), and they decked that helmet out with glitter and sparkle and bows. Her theory was that she couldn't hide the helmet, so she might as well bedazzle it.

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    1. Well, that's understandable. I totally get making lemonade out of lemons in that sense! It's like when people glam up their canes or walkers- totally get that!

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  3. What is going on with that bow...thing...in that photo? lol

    I've only been to one baby shower ever and while it sort of became a pseudo-high school reunion instead, yeah, I'm not big on games, lol.

    Good point about #8, even posting on Facebook is a thing to consider these days.

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    1. What's even funnier is the pictures on the Etsy site of the kid wearing the bow. It's the size of her face.

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  4. LOL. Those big baby bows are crazy stuff. I only have boys so thankfully I've never been pressured by the gift of a bow.

    You really have the perfect attitude of taking things as they come. I have three kids, and I didn't do anything the same between any of them...

    Ugh, the dog thing. People drive me insane with the dog thing. Aw, Cordie and Chomsky. Haha. Such cute names.

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    1. I've also been told that I need to not forget about my dogs when the baby comes. Ugh. As if.

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  5. That bow. Shudders.

    #8: I agree. I don't like to post pictures of my kids. I posted that one of the back of my 5 year old rock climbing (on twitter) and then later deleted it because...I just couldn't.

    My mother-in-law threw me a baby shower after I whined and begged not to have one. I hated every minute of it and I was so pissed off because they served everyone fucking mimosas. You do not do that to a pregnant lady, it's just mean.

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  6. #1 - oh yes. I get this just because I'm the 'right' age for questions of that nature apparently :/

    I like your attitude of taking each thing as it comes, which is as it should be I think. There's no point getting totally frazzled by everything if you don't have to!

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    1. Thank you! We'll see if I can follow through, haha.

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  7. #1 - AMEN TO THAT.

    And kudos to #4. I think that as a society we have WAY too many parties just to get free shit out of people - birthdays, engagement parties, bridal showers, wedding showers (apparently a separate thing now?), baby showers, and that's not even touching holiday gift-giving times. Oy.

    So basically, so far you're a pretty cool pregnant lady ;-)

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    1. Absolutely- materialism has gotten out of control. And with the holidays approaching everyone needs to keep that in mind (unless they want to buy me books, then materialism FTW).

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  8. YOU'RE HAVING A BABY.
    I am still so excited about that. It's weird, sorry.
    But... it's awesome.
    I don't have too many opinions on these things because - no baby and no immediate plans. But I like your thought processes about it.
    YAY BABY.
    Sorry. Fangirling.

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  9. 1. Yes, COMPLETELY agree. People always give you that weird sad look if you say no as well, which is frustrating.
    2. You are now my favourite mum, gender stereotyping children is so damaging.
    8. Freaks me out a little when people put pictures up of other people's children, because then if it's facebook their rules state that technically a picture because theirs and they can use it as they like. Also, yes, you don't know what these acquaintances are up to.

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  10. #1 AMEN to that. I cannot even comprehend what people are thinking when they think it's OK to ask that question. I've been married five years now, so I'm getting it a LOT and it drives me up the wall. There are exactly 2 people I would actually have a legitimate conversation about such a topic, but if you are not someone I would talk to about my sex life, why are you asking me if/when I'm going to have a baby?! I usually try to keep my cool, but I have many blunt and inappropriate things I would like to say to these people...

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